Sunday, April 27, 2008

Silly Daddy!

Laney LOVES the swimming pool. Here she is in her adorable bathing suit that took me forever to find because apparently I am super picky when it comes to what bathing suit I am willing to put on my baby.

It was scary to see what some of these suits look like. Do people seriously put those on their little girls?!?! Ok, so anyways.....

Laney loves to swim. (yeah yeah, I know she can't really swim. You know what I mean though....don't be so picky.) The other day the boys wanted to get in the pool, but Mikaily was sick. So, my husband decided that he would go ahead and take the boys and Laney and get in the pool for a little while. So, the boys ran and got their suits and my hubby grabbed Alaina's suit and put it on her. I was standing in the kitchen and looked over and Laney was crawling across the floor. Ummmmmmmmm.....Excuse me, but are her boobies hanging out?!?

I started laughing. It took me a second to figure out how in the world he had managed to do that to her suit. It wasn't actually on backwards, he just made the straps cross in the front instead of in the back.

Silly Daddy!!

Watch Out, World!! Here Comes Laney!!

I know it is dark and poor qulity and there is no sound, but, you get the point.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

That Is Definitely NOT an Iguana

Some of you may have seen this story on the news already. Don't worry, it's a short video......

The next time you find a mouse in your kitchen, count your lucky could be much, much worse.

P.S. The condo this lady lives in is approx. 7 miles from my house. Why in the world do I live here?!?

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Ropes and Fires and Monkeys, OH MY!

Ahhh, Spring Break. Nothing like a bunch of crazy college kids gathering together on an overly crowded beach while consuming large amounts of alcohol and wearing practically nothing. So, what's a mom of 4 small children to do when this time of year comes around??
A. Stay inside and tightly close all of the blinds.
B. Take a two month vacation to a state that is not quite so Minnesota.
C. Join in on the fun

Well, we chose C. A couple weekends ago we decided to head over the the local beach/pier. It. was. packed. HOWEVER....large crowds bring large amounts of entertainment, mostly in the form of street performers.

We watched an escape artist. He was 16 years old. He was mildly entertaining. He had a couple of guys from the audience strap him into a straight jacket. The most exciting part of his show was that he called Kyle up out of the audience to hold the microphone for him while he was being tied up.

The next guy we saw did scary things like juggle swords and hatchets and things that were on fire. He called Kyle up too, but Kyle didn't want to go anywhere near this guy. I can't blame him, he was a little freaky. He did the whole fire spitting thingy. (Or whatever it's called.)

The whole time we watched this guy, I just kept thinking, "Holy crap! Didn't his mom ever teach him not to play with fire??" and more importantly "Why in the world am I letting my little psycho 3 year old watch this??" I could just see him coming home and trying to figure out how to blow fire out of his crazy little mouth. I could totally picture him running around the house with his curls ablaze, begging for money.

Evan's favorite part was actually the little monkey. It was a little capuchin monkey. They had him there on this little leash (I wonder if I could walk Evan around on one of those little leashes bumming money off of people. He's cute enough, don't ya think??) You could hold out some money (anything from a penny to whatever) and the monkey would come up, take the money, give it a kiss "for good luck" and then drop it in his little tip bucket. You could pay ten bucks or more and have the monkey actually sit on your lap and they would take a Polaroid for you. Ummm, no thanks. Knowing my luck the monkey would bite me and give me the plague. I would prefer my family to remain plague free, thank you very much.

Mikaily saw a little girl getting her face painted, so of course she HAD to get hers painted. Because, we all know that if she left the beach without having a flower painted on the side of her face, she would DIE!

That's kind of a scary picture of her. She looks a little possessed. Oh well, she fit right in with all the other crazies on the beach.

Laney enjoyed hanging out on Daddy's shoulders. She kept groovin' every time the music would play.

We headed down to the water after taking in all of the street performers. We had to herd the children around the bum that was sleeping in the sand. It was a great "stay in school" teaching moment. (No offense to those who are homeless.... I know that some are just in unfortunate circumstances...not that anyone that is homeless is going to be reading my blog....)

While the kids were splashing around, there was a guy that came along tring to strike it rish with his metal detector and offered the boys glow sticks (Mikaily was off somewhere, eating an ice cream cone with her Aunt). At first, I wasn't sure whether we should let the boys play with them or throw them into the ocean. Against my better judgement we let them take the glowing sticks from the stranger...they didn't end up being bombs or anything though...just plain old glow sticks. *shew*

Sorry that picture is so blurry.....

Crazy, drunk, college kids and crazies aside, it was pretty fun.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

Snips and Snails and Puppy-dogs' Tails

Kyle is 5 years old. He, obviously, is a boy. Any of you that have had a 5 year old boy know that they certainly know how to keep life...umm, well, interesting.

Kyle is in preschool. He absolutely loves it. In Florida, you can put your child into a qualified VPK (Voluntary Pre-Kindergarten) class for free if you want to. (So, it's kind of like the schools here go from Pre-K to 12th grade.) Any preschool can qualify to have a VPK class as long as they follow certain criteria set for them by the state. Then, in return, they get state funding. It's really a win-win.

So, every mom of a preschooler knows how hard it can be to get your child a spot in a, make that excellent, preschool. There are waiting lists that are like 3miles long. By the time your child hits the top of the list, they are in 2nd grade already.

We got really lucky. When I went to enroll Kyle (way late, of course), one of the ladies in the office I went to told me about a spot that she knew of that was in an excellent VPK class (even though technically she wasn't supposed to have told me....I guess I'm just so pretty she couldn't resist helping). So, I rushed right over and got him into the class. It's a private school. It is expensive and ritzy and very much upscale. Definitely NOT the place we would have him if we had to be paying the bill ourselves. :) It goes from Pre-K - 8th grade. The older children in the school are always very polite and say "good morning" and "excuse me" and all that jazz. Kyle does well there. He gets in trouble some, but no more than the other little rowdy boys in his class.

Oh, and did I mention the fact that this school is Orthodox? Very much so, in fact. It's not uncommon for Kyle to come home from school talking about his "Lord and Savior Jesus" because of something they have talked about that day.

We were doing Kyle's homework last night. He was told to draw a picture of something that begins with the letter "f". He chose family. I know, how sweet is that?? He drew himself first. I watched him as he drew his head......then his eyes and nose and sweet. He drew spiky hair (which he doesn't have) and then his big, round body. He drew two arms and two legs, just as he should. Then...wait....what the......??? OH. MY. CRAP!!!

That's right, ladies and gentlemen. He decided he wanted to draw himself anatomically correct. I. was. mortified. There was NO way I was going to let him turn this paper into his teacher at his ritzy, Orthodox preschool. I thought that maybe I could just get another piece of paper and have him draw a new picture and tell his teacher that something had spilled on the original, but I figured he would end up ratting me out. I could just see that........

Me: "Sorry his homework isn't on the paper you sent home with him. I spilled a glass of milk on that one, so I just gave him a new one to draw on."

Kyle: "No. NO. No you didn't. You said I had to draw on a new one because I drew myself a ding dong on the other one."

That wouldn't be good. Plus, I didn't want to lie. So, I just told him he had to draw himself some pants. He did. Although, he drew himself, me, Kaily, Evan, Alaina and his dad and he was the only one wearing pants. He didn't have a shirt on either...just pants. He doesn't really like to color, so he didn't want to have to take the time to put clothes on everyone. His teacher is no dummy, so I am sure she put two and two together and figured out what happened. Oh well. There are only a few more weeks of school left. Think I can avoid eye contact for that long???

UGH!! BOYS!!!!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

RaNdOm ThOuGhTs FrOm EvAn

A few weeks ago, I dropped Kyle off at school and then I had to run to Target with Evan and Alaina. I was meandering around through the baby clothes section (only, like, my FAVORITE part of ANY store). Evan was kinda following a few steps behind. I don't really think he was awake yet. I picked up the most adorable little pink shirt I have ever seen when, all of a sudden, I heard Evan Gasp.

Evan: MOMMY!!!!!!! We HAVE to go back home!!!

I turned and looked at him to see what in the world could possibly have happened to elicit this outburst. He was standing about 6 inches away from one of the pillars coming up out of the floor. This particular pillar had a mirror on it. He took both hands and flung them up, on top of his head.

Evan: "MOMMY!!! We HAVE to go back home right now!"
Me: "Why? What's wrong??"
Evan: (as he moans and rolls his eyes at me) "You forgot to put in my curls!!"
Me: "Ummm, ok drama queen. Keep it movin'!!

Yesterday, I stepped on a frog in the driveway. I was in my bare feet, too. I don't think I killed it. At least not immediately. It kinda hobbled off into the grass. It wasn't my fault though. I couldn't see where I was going because I was carrying so much stuff in my arms...and by stuff, I mean my ten month old daughter and my 15 month old niece. I squealed a little. Then yelled at the frog for being "slow and stupid." Evan was standing a few feet away from me when the unfortunate encounter took place. He lectured me on how I had said a bad word and that wasn't a good thing to do (The word "stupid" is forbidden in our house). Then, he looked up at me with his big, brown eyes, and said "It's not a good thing to step on a frog either, I think. It might be some bad luck. So now you have to make sure you don't die."

This afternoon, I was baking cookies. I love baking. Baking relaxes me. Evan came in the kitchen just as I was starting to mix the ingredients together. He asked if he could help and I said "absolutely." He pulled up a chair and began helping me stir all of the gunk together. I pulled out an egg. He asked if he could do it. I said "absolutely."

After we finished cleaning the egg up off the floor, Evan decided he was bored and left the kitchen. 30 seconds later, he came sprinting back into the kitchen screaming "Mom! STOP STOP WAIT!!!!!" So, I did. I laughed at him and asked what in the world was wrong.
He said "Mom, did you put my egg in that bowl there??"
I said "Yes, I did. I'm sorry. I thought you didn't want to anymore."
"I didn't." He said back as he climbed up on the chair again and peered into the bowl. "But, did you put cheese on that egg? Because I don't want cheese on my egg today."

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Florida + Spring = Swimming

Friday, April 11, 2008

Total Cop Out

I suck. I have been so busy lately and I haven't been writing as often as I should. I found this on You Tube awhile back along with a title that said "After 100 Times It's Still Funny." I have to tell you...I think I have watched it close to 50 times.....and it is still freaking funny! So, since I suck so much at writing and can't seem to be able to make my brain work enough to make you all laugh...hopefully this does. It's short.....really short. Watch it....but be forewarned - Don't take a sip of anything that you don't want shooting out of your nose.....

I know, it's a total cop out, but I bet it made you laugh.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

If You Don't Mind, It Doesn't Matter

I hate shopping at Walmart. It sucks. It's crowded and it's stinky and I'm pretty sure that 1 out of every 3 people there have some sort of communicable disease.

I prefer to shop at the local grocery store. However, it tends to put a pretty big dent in my checkbook. It's nice, though. They always have really good buy one, get one deals there. They also bag your groceries for you and offer to carry them out to your car for you....a rarity these days. I usually say no to that, but I went the other day and it was pretty much dead. So I said "what the heck" and had the nice, young man carry (well, push actually) my groceries out for me. As we were approaching the car, he said to me "I always like to guess what kind of car people drive. I figured you would have an SUV" as we opened the door to my minivan.

"An SUV......interesting. Why?" I asked.

"I dunno." He replied.

Well, I am a minivan driver and proud of it. I have said in the past, I am perfectly fine with being uncool. I do find, though, as the days wear on, that I seem to be having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that I am getting older. Now, don't get me wrong. I know I am, technically, still young...but I am getting older. Wanna know how I can tell? Well, I believe the dictionary refers to it as a small furrow, ridge, or crease on a normally smooth surface, caused by crumpling, folding, or shrinking. Only...mine aren't small. And I am pretty sure nothing on my body could be described as "shrinking" for at least the last 5 years. Each time I look in the mirror I see it staring back at me. A big, ugly wrinkle that has decided to take up residence on my forehead!

This darn blasted wrinkle has proven to become my nemesis. It does not matter how much beauty sleep I get. It does not matter what I smear on my face or what I put into my body. It. won't. vacate. I have thought about cutting me some bangs. That would at least hide it. That is, until I look back at the pictures of myself from the last time I had bangs and, trust me, the wrinkle is definitely a better option.

Wanna how else I know I am getting old??

I tried the low rise jeans. Keyword there being "tried." They seem to be pretty hip right now. All the cool, young ladies are wearing them. Unfortunately for me, hip huggers are not something that a woman who has had 4 babies in the last 7 years can pull off easily. Oh, and did I mention that my butt crack was showing constantly? It was not a pretty site. Oh well, who wants a cold butt crack, anyways??

Oh, and then, I was driving in my minivan the other day and a group of teenagers pulled up next to me. The driver was reclined WAY far back. I remember thinking to myself.... "Man, his abs must be tired from holding his head up to see over the steering wheel. I know mine would be." How pathetic is that?? OH, and not to mention the fact that they had their music playing so loudly that it just about made my ears bleed.

I won't even mention the fact that, to me, "staying up late" means I am up past 9.

Oh, and I have a friend who has a sister that is still a teenager. About two weeks ago, her sister went to "a 90's party." Ummm, since when were the 90's so long ago that you can use that as a party theme??

Wow. So this didn't really end up being at all about what I started writing about. In all honesty, I really don't mind getting older. Seriously!! I love my birthdays. Who doesn't like getting to eat your favorite kind of cake?? A cake that you didn't have to make yourself, I might add. And plus you get to blow out candles and make a wish. And we all know that, secretly, you make that wish hoping that birthday candles really are magic and it will totally come true.

I think that the best piece of evidence to support my theory that I am , in fact, getting older is that I don't really WANT to wear hip hugger jeans or play loud music or stay up past nine to go to a 90's party. I am perfectly content with sitting at home in my pajamas and dozing off on the couch while watching me some reality TV. :)

Ok, so anyways....after having said all of this, I will leave you a with one of my favorite quotes....

"Age is a question of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter."
- Satchel Paige